I like to have control of my surroundings. I try to consider all outcomes and prepare myself for what may happen.
But then something occurs that was unplanned. Unexpected. And you have no control.
When in traffic that speeds and slows over and over, you inevitably have to hit the brakes suddenly. Whenever that happens, I do the same things. Brake, assess the distance in front and make sure I stop, then immediately check the rear view to see if I need to move up or over to get out of the way.
I’ve done this drill for as long as I can remember. Brake, look forward, look back. I always thought I would have time to keep from getting hit. I was prepared. I could control the situation.
Then last week we were in traffic. We braked. I made sure I was able to stop. No problem.
But before I even had the chance to glance in my rear view, we felt the impact. We’d been hit.
This sort of accident happens all the time. I thought I could avoid it.
But I couldn’t. It was out of my control. And my kids were in the car.
Luckily, we came out unscathed. But I can’t quite come to terms with the fact that I couldn’t do anything about it. It just happened and we could have been hurt.
I think it will be a while before I can feel comfortable again.
Before I feel like I am back in control.